A lot has been happening lately. I spent the majority of yesterday being super frustrated and imagining shattering glass and ceramic cups and bowls. I looked at mirrors and wanted to punch them. But by the end of the day I was in a chipper mood, thanks to a handful of people including N. I guess I just had a weird night, but what came of it is ultimately better than I ever could have guessed.
I know I'm being vague...um, I got my t-shirt back LOL.
Sorority recruitment is over and bid day is tomorrow. Honestly the whole rush process was so tedious and exhausting. It was all a good experience though, and I'm glad I went through the whole thing, even though my (better?) judgment was suggesting I do otherwise. I ended up finding a house that I actually liked, but this raises more problems for me to think about.
For instance, the money thing. I don't want to ever feel like I'm paying to have friends or paying to have fun or something else like that, because I have plenty of fun without the harsh emptying of my wallet. I don't want to be stereotyped as a "sorority girl", I don't want to have to walk around campus representing something that I don't know if I fully support.
Don't get me wrong, there are certainly aspects that are tempting for me. But as of right now, I'm really on the fence. I guess I'll let bid day unfold and see what happens from there. I can't really tell if I'll be pleased or upset if I don't get a bid; honestly, it could go either way. I'm not sure. I guess we'll see.
Besides that I'm keeping busy enough with work and school. Plus the clubs I signed up for are starting to have all their meetings and such, so I'm gonna check them out and see which ones fit best.
I had a strange urge to write today but there's nothing of substance that really came out, I don't think. I guess this is more of a "hello, I am still here" type of post.
Oh one more thing, C GOT TEXTING, freaking finally. Hahaha, okay I'm out!
9.28.2009
9.24.2009
welcome back & being yourself
Time for a recap of the wild normality of my life in the past week, as well as whats coming up.
I love welcome week at UCI. Seeing everyone out and about and having the campus be an actual bustling hub is such a nice change from the usual shuttling about to class. And sure the interactions consist of lots of "please come rush for us" but it's a lot more interesting than the rest of the school year.
Anteater Involvement Fair was on Monday, so I signed up for Fashion Interest Group, Yearbook, and some Anteater Review magazine. I'm hoping to have lunch with my friend aka the editor of the UCI paper sometime soon so I can write for them too. Til then I'm on the edge of my seat waiting for them to email me and tell me to come to meetings. I can't wait to be involved at UCI and feel some sort of purpose.
The week has been blisteringly hot. Just today I stepped out of my apartment after a cold shower with my hair still wet, and as soon as I emerged into the 100 degree heat I swear to you my head started steaming. It was weird.
Star Trek was showing last night at the park; in all honesty I found it quite boring but I always like mellowing out at nighttime so it was still nice. Then today the Jakes, Rootbeer, and Shiny Toy Guns performed out on the lawn, which was REALLY fun. Although I was pretty damn exhausted from doing who knows what all day it was still really entertaining. Definitely check out Rootbeer -- they're like a non-annoying,
more articulate & stylish version of LMFAO.
Afterwards, we went to my friends place and met up with her roommate, who is astoundingly self-assured and confident of who she is. It was really inspiring and at the same time a little intimidating; I wonder at why I'm not as sure of myself as she is. She's a really interesting person, a very commanding presence, as M so accurately describes.
Anyway, we talked a lot about various things but a topic that came up and was repeatedly emphasized was the importance of being yourself. Not so hard, right? Should be pretty simple.
BUT going into the next few days this is something I'm really going to have to keep in mind. H said be yourself 100% and if they don't like it, fuck them, you don't want to hang out with them anyway.
So I'm definitely keeping this in mind, since the coming days are gonna be dedicated Panhellenic Sorority Recruitment. I signed up after some deliberation and decided that it would be an experience worth retelling and would probably give me some valuable knowledge about myself as well as others, and the functioning of the social scene at UCI.
The recruitment orientation was today and it was packed. Filled to capacity with girls, chatty girls in summery clothes, French manicures and perfect makeup. Needless to say it was pretty overwhelming. Tomorrow starts the first day of rush: check-in is at 4:00pm and the events go on until 11pm. Visiting all nine houses, and then before I leave I have to narrow my options down to seven.
Do I really intend on joining a sorority? No. For a number of reasons, monetary as well as more personal reasons. But I realize I can't really judge and say I don't belong until I've tried it out at the very least. Talking to H really emphasized this to me, she's not a typical sorority girl in any way and yet she still found a place within all the stereotypes.
Not much is making sense right now, words are falling out whichever way they please. Tomorrow is the first day of school as well as the faculty/staff/student sit-in, which means that 2/3 of my classes are cancelled. But I still have to write an extra credit piece on what a UC education means to me, as well as sign up for ASUCI tomorrow and check-in for my first French class ever. Which I am absolutely terrified of taking, wish me luck and tutor me please.
Today I also prolonged a tradition with J & J. Venturing into Aldrich Park at the start of last year, J and I found some stone Buddha statue. We rubbed his belly for good luck, hoping for the best that the 08-09 school year could bring us. Today I rubbed his belly again and wondered what changes the next few months would bring, seeing as the past year was a period of such drastic growth that I feel now, that anything could happen.
GOOD NIGHT
I love welcome week at UCI. Seeing everyone out and about and having the campus be an actual bustling hub is such a nice change from the usual shuttling about to class. And sure the interactions consist of lots of "please come rush for us" but it's a lot more interesting than the rest of the school year.
Anteater Involvement Fair was on Monday, so I signed up for Fashion Interest Group, Yearbook, and some Anteater Review magazine. I'm hoping to have lunch with my friend aka the editor of the UCI paper sometime soon so I can write for them too. Til then I'm on the edge of my seat waiting for them to email me and tell me to come to meetings. I can't wait to be involved at UCI and feel some sort of purpose.
The week has been blisteringly hot. Just today I stepped out of my apartment after a cold shower with my hair still wet, and as soon as I emerged into the 100 degree heat I swear to you my head started steaming. It was weird.
Star Trek was showing last night at the park; in all honesty I found it quite boring but I always like mellowing out at nighttime so it was still nice. Then today the Jakes, Rootbeer, and Shiny Toy Guns performed out on the lawn, which was REALLY fun. Although I was pretty damn exhausted from doing who knows what all day it was still really entertaining. Definitely check out Rootbeer -- they're like a non-annoying,
more articulate & stylish version of LMFAO.
Afterwards, we went to my friends place and met up with her roommate, who is astoundingly self-assured and confident of who she is. It was really inspiring and at the same time a little intimidating; I wonder at why I'm not as sure of myself as she is. She's a really interesting person, a very commanding presence, as M so accurately describes.
Anyway, we talked a lot about various things but a topic that came up and was repeatedly emphasized was the importance of being yourself. Not so hard, right? Should be pretty simple.
BUT going into the next few days this is something I'm really going to have to keep in mind. H said be yourself 100% and if they don't like it, fuck them, you don't want to hang out with them anyway.
So I'm definitely keeping this in mind, since the coming days are gonna be dedicated Panhellenic Sorority Recruitment. I signed up after some deliberation and decided that it would be an experience worth retelling and would probably give me some valuable knowledge about myself as well as others, and the functioning of the social scene at UCI.
The recruitment orientation was today and it was packed. Filled to capacity with girls, chatty girls in summery clothes, French manicures and perfect makeup. Needless to say it was pretty overwhelming. Tomorrow starts the first day of rush: check-in is at 4:00pm and the events go on until 11pm. Visiting all nine houses, and then before I leave I have to narrow my options down to seven.
Do I really intend on joining a sorority? No. For a number of reasons, monetary as well as more personal reasons. But I realize I can't really judge and say I don't belong until I've tried it out at the very least. Talking to H really emphasized this to me, she's not a typical sorority girl in any way and yet she still found a place within all the stereotypes.
Not much is making sense right now, words are falling out whichever way they please. Tomorrow is the first day of school as well as the faculty/staff/student sit-in, which means that 2/3 of my classes are cancelled. But I still have to write an extra credit piece on what a UC education means to me, as well as sign up for ASUCI tomorrow and check-in for my first French class ever. Which I am absolutely terrified of taking, wish me luck and tutor me please.
Today I also prolonged a tradition with J & J. Venturing into Aldrich Park at the start of last year, J and I found some stone Buddha statue. We rubbed his belly for good luck, hoping for the best that the 08-09 school year could bring us. Today I rubbed his belly again and wondered what changes the next few months would bring, seeing as the past year was a period of such drastic growth that I feel now, that anything could happen.
GOOD NIGHT
9.18.2009
forever
It may not mean nothin to y'all
But understand nothing was done for me
So I don't plan on stopping at all
I want this shit forever
---
I want this success, and I'm afraid I'll lose sight of just how much I want it.
If this summer taught me anything...it humbled me and reminded me how that nothing is ever going to come easily. This summer showed me the prize -- the lifestyle I could live if I want it badly enough, and if I prove this want through devoted hard work.
But what is success? It comes in three parts for me and my greatest hope is to be able to gather all three.
1. Money - to not have to wonder where my next meal is coming from, to not have to worry about paying the rent. Or to just buy myself a nice NYC apartment. (: And to be able to buy the clothes/products/shoes that I just LOOK at right now.
2. Happiness - hopefully I'll be able to keep my friends & family close as I try to struggle to the top, and hopefully the rewards will be reaped among us all. A summer in Indonesia taught me the style of Indonesian hospitality that I so respect. It is endlessly giving, thoughtful, and conscious of the needs of others. It's something that I want to be able to incorporate into my life and something that really makes me happy. ALSO, of course, the happiness of doing something that I truly love.
3. Change - am I changing the world? Am I at least changing how some people view the world, or how some people think? Am I changing myself for the better?
I guess this is my reminder to strive.
---
I'm preparing to leave Cupertino once again. Just one year ago, my mind was frantic and my thoughts were scattered. Excited but excited (and anxious) in a thousand different directions. Balance is coming to me slowly and it's going to be the main focus for me this year...
and with that
I wish us all luck. (:
But understand nothing was done for me
So I don't plan on stopping at all
I want this shit forever
---
I want this success, and I'm afraid I'll lose sight of just how much I want it.
If this summer taught me anything...it humbled me and reminded me how that nothing is ever going to come easily. This summer showed me the prize -- the lifestyle I could live if I want it badly enough, and if I prove this want through devoted hard work.
But what is success? It comes in three parts for me and my greatest hope is to be able to gather all three.
1. Money - to not have to wonder where my next meal is coming from, to not have to worry about paying the rent. Or to just buy myself a nice NYC apartment. (: And to be able to buy the clothes/products/shoes that I just LOOK at right now.
2. Happiness - hopefully I'll be able to keep my friends & family close as I try to struggle to the top, and hopefully the rewards will be reaped among us all. A summer in Indonesia taught me the style of Indonesian hospitality that I so respect. It is endlessly giving, thoughtful, and conscious of the needs of others. It's something that I want to be able to incorporate into my life and something that really makes me happy. ALSO, of course, the happiness of doing something that I truly love.
3. Change - am I changing the world? Am I at least changing how some people view the world, or how some people think? Am I changing myself for the better?
I guess this is my reminder to strive.
---
I'm preparing to leave Cupertino once again. Just one year ago, my mind was frantic and my thoughts were scattered. Excited but excited (and anxious) in a thousand different directions. Balance is coming to me slowly and it's going to be the main focus for me this year...
and with that
I wish us all luck. (:
9.13.2009
life lately
My computer/mind have been completely failing me lately, so I've put Asia-trip-related goodness on hold. Also I hate Facebook for leading me to believe that my pictures are uploading successfully, and then after one hour of patiently watching the loading bar tiptoe closer to the end, a popup appears saying "Upload failed!" Thanks for the exclamation point, Facebook, I'm enthusiastic about failure too! SIGH.
So instead of blogging more about Asia or trying to upload pictures again, I've found much more entertainment on the internets.
1. The VMAs were today, yay. Of course I missed it cause I fell asleep, and I don't have cable anyway. Thankfully I checked up on the ever-dependable Perez and found the video of Kanye hatin on my girl Taylor. What a gem. How incredibly rude of him, if I were Taylor I would've hit him with my Moonman. I thought it was kind of sad that KidCudi didn't win a Moonman, because he IS the moon man, isn't he? Hahah. And also I found out that Taylor is like 5'11' or some other Amazonian height. But I digress. What wins me over about Kanye is that he published an apology blog, here it is, in typical Kanye fashion - he got his Caps Lockdown and his excessive exclamation points, what more can we ask for.
"I’M SOOOOO SORRY TO TAYLOR SWIFT AND HER FANS AND HER MOM. I SPOKE TO HER MOTHER RIGHT AFTER AND SHE SAID THE SAME THING MY MOTHER WOULD’VE SAID. SHE IS VERY TALENTED! I LIKE THE LYRICS ABOUT BEING A CHEERLEADER AND SHE’S IN THE BLEACHERS! …………………… I’M IN THE WRONG FOR GOING ON STAGE AND TAKING AWAY FROM HER MOMENT!…………….. BEYONCE’S VIDEO WAS THE BEST OF THIS DECADE!!!! I’M SORRY TO MY FANS IF I LET YOU GUYS DOWN!!!! I’M SORRY TO MY FRIENDS AT MTV. I WILL APOLOGIZE TO TAYLOR 2MRW. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD!!!! EVERYBODY WANNA BOOOOO ME BUT I’M A FAN OF REAL POP CULTURE!!! NO DISRESPECT BUT WE WATCHIN’ THE SHOW AT THE CRIB RIGHT NOW CAUSE … WELL YOU KNOW!!!! I’M STILL HAPPY FOR TAYLOR!!!! BOOOYAAAWWWW!!!! YOU ARE VERY VERY TALENTED!!! I GAVE MY AWARDS TO OUTKAST WHEN THEY DESERVED IT OVER ME… THAT’S WHAT IT IS!!!!!!! I’M NOT CRAZY YALL, I’M JUST REAL. SORRY FOR THAT!!! I REALLY FEEL BAD FOR TAYLOR AND I’M SINCERELY SORRY!!! MUCH RESPECT!!!!!"
......LOL. My outrage on Taylor's behalf subsided a little.
2. Fashion Week in NYC. Happy happy happy. So far BCBG and Derek Lam are my faves, Rag & Bone and Alexander Wang were good too. I have kind of fallen in love with Victoria Beckham, because she comes across as actually kind of cute and fun and non-alien like, contrary to her appearance, plus she knows what she's talking about. And her collection is actually well-designed unlike other celebrity-turned-designers IE LAUREN CONRAD. Honestly why is she even famous. But hoorah for Posh Spice! Christian Siriano too, ALWAYS a favorite.
3. GOSSIP GIRL IS TOMORROW!!!!!!!! I'm as enthusiastic about this as Kanye is about apologizing to Taylor, can't you tell? YAY!!!
---
One week till I'm back in Irvine. Much to do till then!
So instead of blogging more about Asia or trying to upload pictures again, I've found much more entertainment on the internets.
1. The VMAs were today, yay. Of course I missed it cause I fell asleep, and I don't have cable anyway. Thankfully I checked up on the ever-dependable Perez and found the video of Kanye hatin on my girl Taylor. What a gem. How incredibly rude of him, if I were Taylor I would've hit him with my Moonman. I thought it was kind of sad that KidCudi didn't win a Moonman, because he IS the moon man, isn't he? Hahah. And also I found out that Taylor is like 5'11' or some other Amazonian height. But I digress. What wins me over about Kanye is that he published an apology blog, here it is, in typical Kanye fashion - he got his Caps Lockdown and his excessive exclamation points, what more can we ask for.
"I’M SOOOOO SORRY TO TAYLOR SWIFT AND HER FANS AND HER MOM. I SPOKE TO HER MOTHER RIGHT AFTER AND SHE SAID THE SAME THING MY MOTHER WOULD’VE SAID. SHE IS VERY TALENTED! I LIKE THE LYRICS ABOUT BEING A CHEERLEADER AND SHE’S IN THE BLEACHERS! …………………… I’M IN THE WRONG FOR GOING ON STAGE AND TAKING AWAY FROM HER MOMENT!…………….. BEYONCE’S VIDEO WAS THE BEST OF THIS DECADE!!!! I’M SORRY TO MY FANS IF I LET YOU GUYS DOWN!!!! I’M SORRY TO MY FRIENDS AT MTV. I WILL APOLOGIZE TO TAYLOR 2MRW. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD!!!! EVERYBODY WANNA BOOOOO ME BUT I’M A FAN OF REAL POP CULTURE!!! NO DISRESPECT BUT WE WATCHIN’ THE SHOW AT THE CRIB RIGHT NOW CAUSE … WELL YOU KNOW!!!! I’M STILL HAPPY FOR TAYLOR!!!! BOOOYAAAWWWW!!!! YOU ARE VERY VERY TALENTED!!! I GAVE MY AWARDS TO OUTKAST WHEN THEY DESERVED IT OVER ME… THAT’S WHAT IT IS!!!!!!! I’M NOT CRAZY YALL, I’M JUST REAL. SORRY FOR THAT!!! I REALLY FEEL BAD FOR TAYLOR AND I’M SINCERELY SORRY!!! MUCH RESPECT!!!!!"
......LOL. My outrage on Taylor's behalf subsided a little.
2. Fashion Week in NYC. Happy happy happy. So far BCBG and Derek Lam are my faves, Rag & Bone and Alexander Wang were good too. I have kind of fallen in love with Victoria Beckham, because she comes across as actually kind of cute and fun and non-alien like, contrary to her appearance, plus she knows what she's talking about. And her collection is actually well-designed unlike other celebrity-turned-designers IE LAUREN CONRAD. Honestly why is she even famous. But hoorah for Posh Spice! Christian Siriano too, ALWAYS a favorite.
3. GOSSIP GIRL IS TOMORROW!!!!!!!! I'm as enthusiastic about this as Kanye is about apologizing to Taylor, can't you tell? YAY!!!
---
One week till I'm back in Irvine. Much to do till then!
9.12.2009
where to begin
It's been so long since I've actually written any of the thoughts crossing my mind that I don't know where to start. How do I even go about doing this thoroughly?
Where I left off...I was still in Jakarta at my aunt's house. After that, I spent 3 days in Jogja being a tourist and visiting various Buddhist/Hindu temples. I also watched a show about Ramayana that I really enjoyed, and I ate lots of hella CHEAP & DELICIOUS local food. If you know me, you know I love the cheap & delicious. SIGH, we had dinner for six for twelve dollars. And it was SOO yummyyyy...okay, my mouth is watering. And my mom hasn't gone to Costco to re-stock our house yet, so all I've eaten so far is crackers from the plane. No more talk of food.
After Jogja, we returned to my aunt's house to re-pack for the weekend at my grandma's house. A 2-hour drive away, it's in a city called Bandung, and is infested with mosquitoes. My bug bite count probably quadrupled thanks to Bandung.
The first thing I do whenever I get to my grandma's house is look at the photos on the walls. There are tons of them, pictures of me and my cousins and my aunts and uncles at various ages. The most recent one of me is actually from when I was like 12 probably...this must change. But there are pictures of me at three dressed up in snow gear in Ohio, and pictures of me and my grandpa and grandma and cousins at Disneyland when I was six...times I don't really remember, but times I'm glad that my grandma is documenting. There's also a relatively recent family portrait; but sadly my family is absent. I felt like it was kind of mirroring the current situation: just a visit, 3 weeks of peeking into the family life that my cousins live every day. The people in that portrait welcome us with smiles and open arms but soon enough we always turn away.
There's also an 8x10 of my grandfather, who passed away when I was about ten or eleven. His face looks so serious but I've seen pictures where he's holding my sister and he's laughing and it looks like it comes so easily. I see some resemblance in my mother and aunts when I look at his picture, and I think about all the old stories that my mom used to tell of him, like how he didn't get to finish his education, and instead had to work hard to help support his family. And how he burned his one pair of socks while trying to let them dry...hahah. But when it comes down to it, I don't really remember this man, and it frustrates me. I feel like I have no right to miss him, but I guess I just wish he were around (or I were around more) for us to try and be friends. My one memory of him is probably from when I was eight or nine. He was smoking outside, looking pensive and reserved as usual, and my mom nudged me to go outside and tell him to stop smoking. I was a little reluctant to do so, I think at that age I was a little intimidated by him, and ashamed of my sad grasp on the language. But I tiptoed outside and stood next to him, and looked at him and asked in broken Indonesian, "please don't smoke, ok?" I remember him smiling quietly and putting out his cigarette...but that's pretty much all I have. Maybe one more memory of him retrieving a ball that my cousin and I lost...but for the most part, I know him only from stories and recollections.
I tried harder to get to know my grandma for this reason. She's an excellent chef, better at English than my grandpa was (I think) and still a rather active and very generous woman. I just liked being around her because I feel like she glues our family together. Everyone looks to her with such respect and gratitude and in turn, she takes care of everyone very well.
Just being in my grandma's house feels kind of like a time machine. It startled me when I realized that that was the exact house my mother grew up in. I was looking at old photographs and saw the same clocks and cabinets, the same set up...it was pretty crazy. I visualized my mom watching horror movies alone at night and then tiptoeing to her room fearfully...and then retraced her footsteps as I went to bed. I sat around the same dining table that my mom and her siblings and parents had breakfast and lunch and dinner around for countless years, walked around the same house that my mom's brother lived in for his tragically short life. The uncle I'll never know, aside from seeing his youthful face in old pictures. I can't really describe how I feel when I'm at my grandma's house, but it feels like being home, and it's one of my favorite places in the world.
Another thing about Bandung -- it's one of those towns where everyone knows everyone. Or it used to be that kind of town, at least. I met a tofu vendor who used to sell tofu to my mom when she was my age and younger, and I visited the doctor around the corner that my mom used to see...and went to the apothecary to pick up cough medicine, the same apothecary my grandma used to send my mom to pick up prescriptions. The owners still remembered her and invited her in and started a long conversation, in a trademark of Indonesian hospitality. It was pretty crazy realizing how much of my mom's history took place in that town.
...
Where I left off...I was still in Jakarta at my aunt's house. After that, I spent 3 days in Jogja being a tourist and visiting various Buddhist/Hindu temples. I also watched a show about Ramayana that I really enjoyed, and I ate lots of hella CHEAP & DELICIOUS local food. If you know me, you know I love the cheap & delicious. SIGH, we had dinner for six for twelve dollars. And it was SOO yummyyyy...okay, my mouth is watering. And my mom hasn't gone to Costco to re-stock our house yet, so all I've eaten so far is crackers from the plane. No more talk of food.
After Jogja, we returned to my aunt's house to re-pack for the weekend at my grandma's house. A 2-hour drive away, it's in a city called Bandung, and is infested with mosquitoes. My bug bite count probably quadrupled thanks to Bandung.
The first thing I do whenever I get to my grandma's house is look at the photos on the walls. There are tons of them, pictures of me and my cousins and my aunts and uncles at various ages. The most recent one of me is actually from when I was like 12 probably...this must change. But there are pictures of me at three dressed up in snow gear in Ohio, and pictures of me and my grandpa and grandma and cousins at Disneyland when I was six...times I don't really remember, but times I'm glad that my grandma is documenting. There's also a relatively recent family portrait; but sadly my family is absent. I felt like it was kind of mirroring the current situation: just a visit, 3 weeks of peeking into the family life that my cousins live every day. The people in that portrait welcome us with smiles and open arms but soon enough we always turn away.
There's also an 8x10 of my grandfather, who passed away when I was about ten or eleven. His face looks so serious but I've seen pictures where he's holding my sister and he's laughing and it looks like it comes so easily. I see some resemblance in my mother and aunts when I look at his picture, and I think about all the old stories that my mom used to tell of him, like how he didn't get to finish his education, and instead had to work hard to help support his family. And how he burned his one pair of socks while trying to let them dry...hahah. But when it comes down to it, I don't really remember this man, and it frustrates me. I feel like I have no right to miss him, but I guess I just wish he were around (or I were around more) for us to try and be friends. My one memory of him is probably from when I was eight or nine. He was smoking outside, looking pensive and reserved as usual, and my mom nudged me to go outside and tell him to stop smoking. I was a little reluctant to do so, I think at that age I was a little intimidated by him, and ashamed of my sad grasp on the language. But I tiptoed outside and stood next to him, and looked at him and asked in broken Indonesian, "please don't smoke, ok?" I remember him smiling quietly and putting out his cigarette...but that's pretty much all I have. Maybe one more memory of him retrieving a ball that my cousin and I lost...but for the most part, I know him only from stories and recollections.
I tried harder to get to know my grandma for this reason. She's an excellent chef, better at English than my grandpa was (I think) and still a rather active and very generous woman. I just liked being around her because I feel like she glues our family together. Everyone looks to her with such respect and gratitude and in turn, she takes care of everyone very well.
Just being in my grandma's house feels kind of like a time machine. It startled me when I realized that that was the exact house my mother grew up in. I was looking at old photographs and saw the same clocks and cabinets, the same set up...it was pretty crazy. I visualized my mom watching horror movies alone at night and then tiptoeing to her room fearfully...and then retraced her footsteps as I went to bed. I sat around the same dining table that my mom and her siblings and parents had breakfast and lunch and dinner around for countless years, walked around the same house that my mom's brother lived in for his tragically short life. The uncle I'll never know, aside from seeing his youthful face in old pictures. I can't really describe how I feel when I'm at my grandma's house, but it feels like being home, and it's one of my favorite places in the world.
Another thing about Bandung -- it's one of those towns where everyone knows everyone. Or it used to be that kind of town, at least. I met a tofu vendor who used to sell tofu to my mom when she was my age and younger, and I visited the doctor around the corner that my mom used to see...and went to the apothecary to pick up cough medicine, the same apothecary my grandma used to send my mom to pick up prescriptions. The owners still remembered her and invited her in and started a long conversation, in a trademark of Indonesian hospitality. It was pretty crazy realizing how much of my mom's history took place in that town.
...
9.11.2009
back to reality
I have been home for less than one hour and already I have made five separate lists of things to do before I go back to Irvine. SIGH, back to reality much?
My last night in Singapore I tossed and turned, insomnia-stricken, my mind running wild with tons of things to write about -- the trip, my experiences, observations, resolutions, etc...but now I'm kind of lazy. I just want to sit and be home for a while, vegetate for a bit. Real blog coming tomorrow I guess. I only have a week before I'm back at school sooo...busy days ahead! (:
My last night in Singapore I tossed and turned, insomnia-stricken, my mind running wild with tons of things to write about -- the trip, my experiences, observations, resolutions, etc...but now I'm kind of lazy. I just want to sit and be home for a while, vegetate for a bit. Real blog coming tomorrow I guess. I only have a week before I'm back at school sooo...busy days ahead! (:
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